Some Honesty

I was looking at my iPod the other day and plugged it into my computer to see my top 25 most played. I looked at my top played song: 1,995 plays--it's not even my favorite song. Almost two thousand plays on a song that is three minutes and thirty two seconds long. That's 7049 minutes or 117.5 hours, or approximately 5 days. I have spent 5 days of my life reliving a song that I have attached some memory to. I have spent 117.5 hours dwelling on the past. Concerned with a mistake, a former or current crush, rooted in my silly childish angst crazed antics. My music, that of which I love so dearly, has not set me free but kept me in the past or the unattainable present. Whether it be the brilliant blue in that girls' eyes or the majestic limitless blue of the sky as it is scattered with soft tufts of clouds; I have been punishing myself. I have created only envy and wanting. I guess my mistake is connecting my music to such things, but then my songs wouldn't have near as many listens were I not to. After all "You Won't Know" isn't really a good song. It just holds some pathetic level of sentimentality. It does not have the beauty of "Solea" in Miles Davis' Sketches of Spain, yet "Soleo" isn't even on my top 25. I need to hear a new perspective; I need the thoughts, voice and ideas from someone who can do more than see in the dark. I want  my perspective, ideas and thoughts to be challenged; I want to see more than the small fragment of light that I have.
"The woods are lovely, dark, and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep
And miles to go before I sleep."